Nick Affliction

[Miss Demeanour]

This poor bloke must be related or friend of Nick 

Cow leaps three foot fence and squashes car

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/8695400/Cow-leaps-three-foot-fence-and-squashes-car.html


The frightened Friesian has written off Robert's Citroen C5 after denting the bonnet and breaking a wheel after bounding onto the busy road.

Stunned police later breath-tested Robert after he called 999 to report the collision.

It is understood the cow which died at the scene had been trying to escape from a farmer when it jumped into the road on the outskirts of Leek, Staffs.

Robert escaped with cuts and bruises despite skidding almost 80 yards and ending up on the wrong side of the road as he tried to stop.

The 24-year-old said: "I am now looking out for low-flying cows when I am driving ."

[Nick]

 

Mind you, there was that incident with the canoe 

[Miss Demeanour]

 

A group of canoeists are paddling along the canal whan a funeral procession goes past. One of the guys takes off his hat and holds it to his chest. "Blimey" says his mate, "I've been paddling with you for twenty years and it's the first time I've seen you do that!"
"I know" says the first guy, " but we were married for a long time. I'll miss the old girl!"

[Miss Creant Commander of the picklement and baking BAb(Hons)]

Mind you, there was that incident with the canoe 

And the police horse...

Miss D I had thought better of you, go on off you go, grab your hat despite the heat.

[Nick]

Oh yes, the police horse 

[Miss Demeanour]

Miss D I had thought better of you, go on off you go, grab your hat despite the heat.

Oh Miss C  - you must be poorly. No one thinks any good of me